Theo Verelst Wanted page
Because of some quite extraordinary personal circumstances,
which only recently have been admitted to be the result of serious
fears and shames in my family and in relation with my former
employer (Delft University), I only know feel in a situation
to resume some of the contacts that I lost by being stuck
in Amsterdam without proper means of transportation and
communication (with the lucky exception of good old email),
and especially because of not having the faintest possiblity of
ascertaining what forces actually were (and are) the source of
my idiotic situation.
There are some people who I more or less instensively and
intimately have been with in the past that I can't reach
at the moment, and some of my other pages can give some clear
indication of the possible reasons for that, but who I would
very much like to be in touch with again. Considereing the
situation I'm only now getting a little bit of tangible
evidance for has existed for a long time in my life already,
some contacts go back guite some years. I presume that some
computerized people can provide some possibly indirect links to
them, so this seems at least a reasonable starting point to try
to restart some contact, this time with at least some ideas
of what actually may have been the case with some of the people
I was lucky to spent time with.
I realize that most of the information on this page os of a very
personal nature, but since various people have already deemed it
legitimate to peek into and distribute widely significant
information stolen from every personal belonging I have,
I guess that won't be too much of a difference. Besides, I have
nothing to hide (I think). Can one put himself so naked on the
internet? Remember a woman who scorned David for dancing naked
got infertile as a punishment of God ... (if you believe in Him
at all, otherwise just consider me a touch excentric with good
motivation).
If some of the people I write about feel indignified because
of a breach of privacy I apologize and suggest a fast message
in the guestbook or over email to get their names and things they
shared with me of this page. Again, I only want to be in touch
with some people I loved again, and see no more efficient,
and broadly scoped (some are from abroad) way of doing it.
What does he think he is doing?
Since many of the people I mention on this page (and yes, I do
have a fairly diverse and serious range of (even reachable) male
friends and acqaintances as well) are women, it is a logical
question what I see as legitimate and desirable possible
relations.
Again I would like to point at some of my other pages (...)
to emphasize that I take it as very possible that various persons
on this page have had to do with possibly very serious types
of both sexual and power abuse, and that my interest in them is
in spite of this. That is: it might explain behaviour that
I couldn't deal with in the past, it is not the reason that
I want to be in touch, and it will not stop me from having
any kind of relation with all that it seems fitting with.
More history and thoughts
Personal history and thoughts (Latest Update 15 april 1998): some more on the subject of
abuse and about the development of my thoughts on the subject
and some of the people whom it (possibly) concerns.
Ingrid Vos
Also see above link.
Melinda de Meij
Very attractive person I met during a performance and had some
very happy music making in common with, both herself and
her bass-playing made her company I would have liked to
continue and give more content. Through her sister and another
musician I understood that would be not such a good idea, even
though I had not the faintest idea as to the why, I (stupidly)
assumed their judgement was of posivit value. When I sometimes
met her later I didn't know exactly what to think, maybe I should
have been clearer.
Tal Ben Zvi (IL)
I met her in Barcelona (esp), while staying in a yought hostel
with a group of people from Holland, after having been on a
joint address near Berga (Pyrenees), while having dinner.
Some of the members of the group I was traveling with appearently
invited her (or possibly knew her, but I can olny guess), and
we started talking while walking in the area afterwards.
In short we spent a long night in the area of the Barcelona market
(which is far from desolate in summer nights), got closer, and
decided (on her proposal) to travel further together. After
some conversing, because there was a limited numbers of cars
to travel with, and because until a little before I had agreed
to travel further with another girl from the group, who appearently
(unfortunately, because I liked her a lot) changed her mind, we
agreed to meet again at the home af a girl who was staying
in her parents house in France,and who I had promised to visit,
possibly with some people from the group. I didn't know exactly
what she wanted, I lived in the same house for two years with her,
and it was clear that we had something valuable, but since she
started sleeping with someone else after having been out with
her one night, I didn't know exactly what to expect (I had no idea
about what realy may have been going on), and from our communication
before I left, there were expectations of having more than a
casual relation, bit to my knownledge she was at that point still
in another relationship. All a bit complicated, but it makes clear
that the situatio of me arriving with someone I would sleep with
may well have caused hardship for her, even though I called her
upfront, and though she showed similar behaviour and appearently
didn't think bad of it.
I short, the rest of the story is that we went over Orleans (where
we found our first hotel), to Paris, stayed there a few weeks
visiting amoung other things a lot of art exhibitions (she was
an art/geography major), lived in a borrowed tent, and visited
someone I knew from a popmusic workshop in a small village in
the north of France. After she hitch hiked to London, I returned
to Holland to arrange some work affairs, and we were aware of the
difficulties of continuing the relationship, since Israel is both
for away from Holland and from the US, where I wanted to go.
After some not so easy phonecalls (for probably a whole lot more
profound reasons than I was arare of, because why would she have
such great difficulty traveling along to my home?), I decided to
go to London, where we could stay in a friend's appartment for
another few weeks, and spent most time together, and some with
the girl who lived there visiting and going out in various places
in London and Cambridge.
The at that point hard ending was, that we agreed to travel some
more to Berlin or Prague (using my car again, and after some
financial arrangements), buit she backed out on that, by telling
me right before the metro entrance, knowing I had to catch my
bus back for university matters, that she didn't want to go on
any more at all. From someone with who only several days before
an important issue was wether or not she was pregnant, and what
to possibly do about that (those condoms weren't for nothing),
that is quite a cold shower.
Remember that I didn't have a clue as to the real reasons for
a lot of behaviour, also when she wrote me that she didn't love
enough to go on (which was rather a contrast with her wanting to
meet later in the US as I would getr there, and with her own
drive to persue the relation in the first place), and that
I also didn't understand her difficulties with me coming to
Israel, which on my later salary would have been very easy,
first she seemed to want to draw me by making clear academics
in Israel meet high standards, later she ade clear she didn't
want me there because of the dangerous circumstances.
Andrea Schwyter (CH)
I met her on a new years party in Amsterdam, and if at that point
I'd still have my christian moral of 4 years or so before, I would
have to
be forgiven of sleeping with someone the first night. Luckily,
I can simply observe that it was one of the better things that
happened (by mutual agreement and choice), and it led to a
relationship where for some time I very much enjoyed her company
and the house she had in Switserland. I wanted to take her to
the US if I would get there, but at that point it seemed all
too much for her, and it ended up that the last time I visited her
a few years ago we still (from the looks of it both) had pretty
much the same feelings, without the (for me desirable)
continuous relationship (emotional and sexual).
Too me it seemed that it was a bit too much for her, she worked
as physio therapist and probably wanted her own business, and
driving over on a weekend and planning on going far abroad isn't
directly compatible with a logical continuation of life in Biel.
Some time ago, as of course (see above link) I communicated with
her in spirit, it became horribly clear that a whole lot more has
been going on than simple choice, "dein Fater is ein Verbrecher",
doesn't sound very irrelevant to me.
I tried to send a letter to an old address recently, but it
bounced, I guess too much was (and is) going on, I have a number,
so if I manage a phonecard I will try and call her if it feels right.
A nice recharge time in switserland doesn't sound too far from
a little paradise to me.
Lisa (Lamree ?)
Also see link above.
Josette Peijnenborg
I had a band with her as lead singer, we met at a pop-music workshop
in Delft, and were on the verge of having a more than friendly
relationship for quite some time, but somehow see seemed to hold
that of, even though I found her very attractive, and wanted
a lasting relation with her.
At the time I didn't have much understanding as to the why.
Lost contact after she finished her industrial design study
and she went east (in Holland), pity.
Wendy Hoff (currently ?)
Marion Knoester
Andreas Pruess (DE)